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Martin Supercharged
 My Car: BMW 520d M Sport & MINI Clubman Cooper S
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 5326
Location: Swindon
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 11:06 am Post subject: |
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That in no way means that naming cars is in any way 'cool'.......
I have never named a car and never will, but it entertains the children
Patsy.....  _________________
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Blarno Motorhead
 My Car: A homo's devil machine and a rattly tin box with scaffolding
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 8241
Location: The corporate whore juggernaut
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 3:10 pm Post subject: |
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Puns
Quite often, replies to various threads degenerate into pun matches. Some are funny, others are so awful they're funny. _________________ This is only gonna end in one of two ways, and in both of them you die. |
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Guitar Zero Turbocharged
 My Car: Monkey spunk moped
Joined: 30 Dec 2006 Posts: 3296
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 7:13 pm Post subject: |
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Metaaaaaaal
A scant few of us worship at the church of metal - for those of you who are non believers - we pray for your souls in vain hope that the Holy Ghost of Dimebag Darrell one day sets you free.
Fords are great, five cylinder ones are greater
Anything with 5 cylinders is great, because the Ur quattro had one and blessed are the ones who follow in it's footsteps. I'm on my second 5 pot, which makes me awesome.
BMWs are o.k, they were great when I had one, sadly the greatness died when I sold mine and Herr Fukkensieuppen decreed that run flat tyres were a ' zehr gut ' idea. Greatness is due to visit the BMW range again when they do a new M5 with a manual gearbox and when I buy a 730d for £17k. _________________ Previous convictions :
2006 Focus ST 2.5
2001 BMW 520i
2002 Focus 2.0 zetec
1999 Fiat Punto |
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SpecB Turbocharged
 My Car: Subaru Legacy 3.0R SpecB
Joined: 19 Feb 2008 Posts: 3024
Location: Home, office, the stables or somewhere in between.
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 7:22 pm Post subject: |
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Swearing
There is no swearchecker on here so nothing is censored.
The stock reply to something not liked by Kraftwerk is usually "**** off". _________________
Mark |
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Martin Supercharged
 My Car: BMW 520d M Sport & MINI Clubman Cooper S
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 5326
Location: Swindon
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 7:31 pm Post subject: |
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| Pie 'n' mash wrote: | | Greatness is due to visit the BMW range again when they do a new M5 with a manual gearbox and when I buy a 730d for £17k. |
I've given you a load to choose from, what's stopping you?  _________________
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Guitar Zero Turbocharged
 My Car: Monkey spunk moped
Joined: 30 Dec 2006 Posts: 3296
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 7:34 pm Post subject: |
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I may wait until next march and get a 750i for 37 pence. _________________ Previous convictions :
2006 Focus ST 2.5
2001 BMW 520i
2002 Focus 2.0 zetec
1999 Fiat Punto |
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Martin Supercharged
 My Car: BMW 520d M Sport & MINI Clubman Cooper S
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 5326
Location: Swindon
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 7:41 pm Post subject: |
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First Dan with his 850 and now you, all this talk and no action....! _________________
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DarthBalls Supercharged
 My Car: MX5 2.0 Sport, Skoda Fabia 1.4 Comfort
Joined: 21 Feb 2008 Posts: 5355
Location: At home....drawing pictures....of mountaintops
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 7:45 pm Post subject: |
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Some of us guys on here drive girls' cars.
Literally in my case as my wife makes the payments on our MX5, it is, of course registered in my name.  _________________ Leaves your gusset lemon fresh... |
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Guitar Zero Turbocharged
 My Car: Monkey spunk moped
Joined: 30 Dec 2006 Posts: 3296
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 7:58 pm Post subject: |
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What talk ? - I've simply alluded to the slight possibility of maybe thinking about dipping my toe in the watery goodness that is a 7 series.
I haven't
" pulled an Alf "
and started threads various about the eleventy million different cars that may be a possible replacement for the world's most expensive 156 GTA.
There is lots to consider, not including the furious amounts of man maffs required to make the swap vaguely sensible. _________________ Previous convictions :
2006 Focus ST 2.5
2001 BMW 520i
2002 Focus 2.0 zetec
1999 Fiat Punto |
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Martin Supercharged
 My Car: BMW 520d M Sport & MINI Clubman Cooper S
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 5326
Location: Swindon
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 8:06 pm Post subject: |
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The mere suggestion is enough and when it's made more than once in different threads, it's time to get one bought!!!
The good thing about man maffs is that it doesn't take long and gives you the right answer, so there really is no excuse
I used Man Maffs when quickly moving for a £13k budget to 120d budget to a 130i budget. I managed to get it to work out that changing from a 3 year old Megane made financial sense  _________________
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"him" Turbocharged
 My Car: is 'wikkid innit' & '04 Scenic Dynamique
Joined: 30 Jan 2007 Posts: 4726
Location: Cornwall
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 8:33 pm Post subject: |
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| Martin wrote: | I used Man Maffs when quickly moving for a £13k budget to 120d budget to a 130i budget. I managed to get it to work out that changing from a 3 year old Megane made financial sense  |
I would love to see the workings for that "calculation"  _________________ Remember - A gym without chalk is a heath spa... |
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PR Twin-charged
 My Car: -o--o-
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 9776
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 9:37 pm Post subject: |
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I think it goes like this:
3.0 litres + 6 Cylinders, x 265bhp +232 lb/ft = Where do I sign? _________________
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Martin Supercharged
 My Car: BMW 520d M Sport & MINI Clubman Cooper S
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 5326
Location: Swindon
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 9:59 pm Post subject: |
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| "him" wrote: | | Martin wrote: | I used Man Maffs when quickly moving for a £13k budget to 120d budget to a 130i budget. I managed to get it to work out that changing from a 3 year old Megane made financial sense  |
I would love to see the workings for that "calculation"  |
You start with convincing yourself that your 3 year old French car that is just out of warranty is going to start costing you a fortune in repairs and move on from there!!!! Next step is the fact that the new car isn't going to need a service for 2 years, another couple of hundred saved, tyres will last for 3 years, another couple of hundred etc etc. It all adds up
You need a special spreadsheet, let me know when the time is right and I'll arrange one for you!
I can easily put a convincing case together without complicated Piers style maths  _________________

Last edited by Martin on Fri Aug 15, 2008 10:01 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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PR Twin-charged
 My Car: -o--o-
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 9776
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 10:01 pm Post subject: |
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I seem to remember helping to reassure you that it was an excellent idea, Martin!
 _________________
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Martin Supercharged
 My Car: BMW 520d M Sport & MINI Clubman Cooper S
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 5326
Location: Swindon
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Posted: Fri Aug 15, 2008 10:02 pm Post subject: |
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Yes, help and support from like minded individuals really helps make the Man Maffs stack up. You can't put a figure on that sort of thing! _________________
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BeN The Motor, Singapore branch.
 My Car: Toyota Corolla View My Motor: .
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 8925
Location: Singapore
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Posted: Sat Aug 16, 2008 7:34 am Post subject: |
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| SpecB wrote: | Swearing
There is no swearchecker on here so nothing is censored.
The stock reply to something not liked by Kraftwerk is usually "**** off". |
Or Buy a Mac.  _________________ On the other side of the world - Hurlecot de Millou
Not the same since 2008
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kraftwerk Twin-charged
 My Car: Mercedes-Benz SL500; Fiat 128; Fiat 238B Weinsberg
Joined: 08 Jan 2007 Posts: 8436
Location: London
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Posted: Sat Aug 16, 2008 8:05 am Post subject: |
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| SpecB wrote: | Swearing
There is no swearchecker on here so nothing is censored.
The stock reply to something not liked by Kraftwerk is usually "**** off". |
At least everyone knows where they stand. _________________ I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying. |
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Racing Twin-charged
 My Car: Z1, 135i Coupe and E500.
Joined: 09 Jan 2007 Posts: 9551
Location: Work
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Posted: Sun Aug 17, 2008 4:05 pm Post subject: |
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Don't take anything said by anyone seriously. Some forummers (Kraft, Pie (Guitar Zero)) may appear to be eye-poppingly rude on a fairly frequent basis but it's all part of their own special charm and not to be taken offence at!
And if you do take something seriously, be prepared to endure plenty of banter over it. All of which is not meant seriously....by and large.... _________________
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Blarno Motorhead
 My Car: A homo's devil machine and a rattly tin box with scaffolding
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 8241
Location: The corporate whore juggernaut
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Posted: Sun Aug 17, 2008 4:21 pm Post subject: |
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The Colin Shot
The obligatory photo that must be taken when test driving any vehicle, of the rear seats folded down to show off the loadspace. _________________ This is only gonna end in one of two ways, and in both of them you die. |
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Racing Twin-charged
 My Car: Z1, 135i Coupe and E500.
Joined: 09 Jan 2007 Posts: 9551
Location: Work
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Posted: Sun Aug 17, 2008 7:53 pm Post subject: |
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Nobby, Chalky and Ginge
A fearless trio of Her Majesty's servants whose escapades from another era are occasionally related in inimitably amusing style by "G" after lashings and lashings of Hendricks.
Airplane/Treadmill Debate
A recurring debate over whether a jet aircraft could take off if you replaced the runway with a giant opposed treadmill. Gets heated.
Dark and Stormy Night
Undead thread about nothing very much which gives Count Dracula a run for his money in the longevity stakes.
The Other Place
A reference to the actual Autocar forums. Which aren't much cop in our considered opinions. _________________
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M. Supercharged
 My Car: is desirable
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 5529
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Posted: Sun Aug 17, 2008 8:39 pm Post subject: |
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| Blarno wrote: | The Colin Shot
The obligatory photo that must be taken when test driving any vehicle, of the rear seats folded down to show off the loadspace. |
The Blarno Shot
Shot of car components in a different order to which they left the factory
The resident Spannerman shot
See the Blarno shot _________________ Generic reply key:
1. Happy birthday
2. Congratulations
3.
4. Good luck
5. Buy a mac
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GonnaBreakABuggy Turbocharged
 My Car: Peugeot 306
Joined: 26 Jan 2007 Posts: 3066
Location: Rotherham
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Posted: Sun Aug 17, 2008 10:09 pm Post subject: |
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Hey, most of my components never left a factory, they were born in a shed  _________________
*Innocent Whistle* |
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Blarno Motorhead
 My Car: A homo's devil machine and a rattly tin box with scaffolding
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 8241
Location: The corporate whore juggernaut
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Posted: Sun Aug 17, 2008 10:11 pm Post subject: |
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| Michael wrote: |
The Blarno Shot
Shot of car components in a better order to which they left the factory
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 _________________ This is only gonna end in one of two ways, and in both of them you die. |
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marcg Petrolhead
My Car: BMW E46 320d SE Touring
Joined: 14 Oct 2007 Posts: 1063
Location: Bristol
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 9:12 am Post subject: |
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Doing a Racing
Forgetting which fuel your car takes. |
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Racing Twin-charged
 My Car: Z1, 135i Coupe and E500.
Joined: 09 Jan 2007 Posts: 9551
Location: Work
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 10:07 am Post subject: |
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Oi! I did not forget which fuel it took. I merely put the wrong fuel in. There is a fine but important distinction! _________________
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Dr. Hfuhruhurr Propellorhead
 My Car: pending
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 12012
Location: Europa
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 11:43 am Post subject: |
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| The pump was wrongly labelled, wasn't it? Had a similar pause for thought this morning, refilling the hire car before returning it. Having stopped at a Shell place, had to remind myself to put diesel in, not V Power. Hertz always give you dire warnings that their insurance doesn't cover mis-fuelling. |
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Racing Twin-charged
 My Car: Z1, 135i Coupe and E500.
Joined: 09 Jan 2007 Posts: 9551
Location: Work
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 12:16 pm Post subject: |
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So it would appear - it was green and said "98" on it, but nevertheless clearly actually contained diesel. _________________
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TimR Turbocharged
 My Car: Fiat Coupe Turbo, BMW E39 M5
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 4897
Location: On the hard shoulder
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 12:23 pm Post subject: |
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Doing a Racing Part II
Accidentally buying another car when you're just out and about browsing, despite having nowhere to keep it. |
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Racing Twin-charged
 My Car: Z1, 135i Coupe and E500.
Joined: 09 Jan 2007 Posts: 9551
Location: Work
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 12:33 pm Post subject: |
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to be strictly accurate that should be followed by "so you then drive it 2,000 miles to a place where you do have somewhere to keep it" _________________
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BeN The Motor, Singapore branch.
 My Car: Toyota Corolla View My Motor: .
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 8925
Location: Singapore
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 12:40 pm Post subject: |
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I though doing a Racing meant epic cross-country journeys from London to Moscow and back?  _________________ On the other side of the world - Hurlecot de Millou
Not the same since 2008
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woof woof Twin-charged
 My Car: Is Red.
Joined: 03 Jan 2007 Posts: 9727
Location: Sat on the rug, nice and cosy.
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 1:45 pm Post subject: |
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| My name is woof woof and I'm an animal loving vegetarian Northerner with a passion for cars and specifically roadsters. I tend to over analyse things (which is a good thing in electronics) and also to overcompensate. 90% of what I post (including the silly rhymes) is meant to be harmless fun and the rest is over analytical tosh. If I upset anyone I'll happily apologise, just say summot. I love you all, and I'll prove it after dinner and a movie. PM me and we'll arrange a meet, I'll be daddy. |
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M. Supercharged
 My Car: is desirable
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 5529
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 3:22 pm Post subject: |
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| Twelfth Monkey wrote: | Defensive owner's cape and moonboots.
Ever feel that you spend an inordinately long time defending your choice of wheels? That people just don't understand? I did, and on occasion still do. To commit such thoughts to the electronic ether is to don said cape and moonboots, in the manner of a low-budget superhero of sorts...
Still, I had an A3 before.
Do not be afraid to don said attire; your passion for your car will be respected, even if you can't quite talk the world into agreeing. |
See also: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/7568246.stm _________________ Generic reply key:
1. Happy birthday
2. Congratulations
3.
4. Good luck
5. Buy a mac
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cbeaks1 Petrolhead
 My Car: Kuga Titanium
Joined: 18 Jul 2007 Posts: 1498
Location: Yorkshire
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 3:25 pm Post subject: |
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| Their pride and joy has a car-bra. Eeeuuuggh. |
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woof woof Twin-charged
 My Car: Is Red.
Joined: 03 Jan 2007 Posts: 9727
Location: Sat on the rug, nice and cosy.
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 3:26 pm Post subject: |
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| Why feel the need to defend your own decisions? Just accept that other people have the right to be wrong. |
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Racing Twin-charged
 My Car: Z1, 135i Coupe and E500.
Joined: 09 Jan 2007 Posts: 9551
Location: Work
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 3:53 pm Post subject: |
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| cbeaks1 wrote: | | Their pride and joy has a car-bra. Eeeuuuggh. |
Just think - if they hadn't spent all that money on all that tat, they could probably be proudly sporting that car-bra on a nice RS4 rather than an A3! _________________
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Rodge Turbocharged
 My Car: Needs a service
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 4342
Location: Schmocation.
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 4:52 pm Post subject: |
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We must also take time to mention the Motor Forum F1 Game.
Where our money is regularly put where our mouths are. This competition is taken so seriously that I've forgotten who won it last year.
People also like to change their identity here and the confusion adds to the charm of the place. _________________
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm...ds.individual&VideoID=2869045 |
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marcg Petrolhead
My Car: BMW E46 320d SE Touring
Joined: 14 Oct 2007 Posts: 1063
Location: Bristol
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 4:58 pm Post subject: |
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| Actually, that's one thing that really annoys me and really makes the cliqueyness of the place - you have to really know who's who if they keep changing their names. If there's one thing guaranteed to exclude newbies it's getting to know the tone of the posters then having to start all over again. |
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BeN The Motor, Singapore branch.
 My Car: Toyota Corolla View My Motor: .
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 8925
Location: Singapore
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 4:58 pm Post subject: |
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Motor Forum F1 Game History
Started out in 2005 when we were back on the old Autocar Forum. Big Blue seemed to be heading for the title, until his cheating ways were exposed and he was subesquently stripped of all points. I think Dan won that year (can't remember).
2006, and Autocar's Sarah Wakely got off to a flying start, leading until the halfway point before she left Autocar for another mag. Big TC eventually took the title (I think).
2007 was the first edition on The Motor, and it was a mighty fine competition. The lead changed hands several times, with Nick (then known as Stevie Wonder) joining midway through the season and completely blitzing everybody. He certainly would have won the title had he entered from the start. Right at the end though, an unlikely winner emerged, as Sav, trailing for much of the season, suddenly pulled off a masterclass in the last four races to nick it, mirroring the exploits of a certain Kimi Raikkonen in the real championship.  _________________ On the other side of the world - Hurlecot de Millou
Not the same since 2008
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PG Turbocharged
My Car: Jaguar X type 3.0 Sport; Shogun "truck"; Iveco horse lorry
Joined: 23 Dec 2006 Posts: 3414
Location: Shropshire
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 5:05 pm Post subject: |
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| BeN wrote: | | ....with Nick (then known as Stevie Wonder)... |
and now known as Dr Hfuhuhurururghjuhuhry or something like that....do try and keep up BeN. |
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BeN The Motor, Singapore branch.
 My Car: Toyota Corolla View My Motor: .
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 8925
Location: Singapore
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 5:36 pm Post subject: |
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I left that out on purpose... _________________ On the other side of the world - Hurlecot de Millou
Not the same since 2008
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PG Turbocharged
My Car: Jaguar X type 3.0 Sport; Shogun "truck"; Iveco horse lorry
Joined: 23 Dec 2006 Posts: 3414
Location: Shropshire
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 5:39 pm Post subject: |
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| BeN wrote: | I left that out on purpose... |
Aha. Caught out by your clever double bluff. Is their no end to your fiendishness. I expect that the next Bond villain will be modelled on you. |
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BeN The Motor, Singapore branch.
 My Car: Toyota Corolla View My Motor: .
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 8925
Location: Singapore
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 5:41 pm Post subject: |
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| PG wrote: | | BeN wrote: | I left that out on purpose... |
Aha. Caught out by your clever double bluff. Is their no end to your fiendishness. I expect that the next Bond villain will be modelled on you. |
I guess I should work on my evil laugh.
Muahahahaha!
 _________________ On the other side of the world - Hurlecot de Millou
Not the same since 2008
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Dr. Hfuhruhurr Propellorhead
 My Car: pending
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 12012
Location: Europa
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 8:59 pm Post subject: |
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| PG wrote: | | BeN wrote: | | ....with Nick (then known as Stevie Wonder)... |
and now known as Dr Hfuhuhurururghjuhuhry or something like that....do try and keep up BeN. |
Shucks - you people never seen Man With Two Brains? |
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Blarno Motorhead
 My Car: A homo's devil machine and a rattly tin box with scaffolding
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 8241
Location: The corporate whore juggernaut
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 9:17 pm Post subject: |
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Wasn't there also Mr Urhurmelmahay? _________________ This is only gonna end in one of two ways, and in both of them you die. |
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Skyhook Petrolhead
 My Car: Fiat Panda 100HP
Joined: 03 Jan 2007 Posts: 2217
Location: Nottinghamshire
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 9:20 pm Post subject: |
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| Dr. Hfuhruhurr wrote: |
Shucks - you people never seen Man With Two Brains? |
"Damn, your drink drive tests are hard!"
And BeN, Sav did not win the 2007 title in a masterclass, he is merely a spawny chancer who profited from others having a life and taking their eye off the ball a bit.
Not still bitter, not bitter... _________________ Sleeping is giving in, no matter what the time is... |
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Dr. Hfuhruhurr Propellorhead
 My Car: pending
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 12012
Location: Europa
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 9:25 pm Post subject: |
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| Blarno wrote: | | Wasn't there also Mr Urhurmelmahay? |
Miss Ann Urhurmelmahay - the brain in a jar in his lab. |
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Big TC Supercharged
 My Car: Seat Toledo 20V SE, Citroen C1 Diesel
Joined: 28 Dec 2006 Posts: 5619
Location: Stuck in my ways
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 9:43 pm Post subject: |
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BeN - I didn't win the F1 Forum Game in 2006 - I leapt into an early lead (like last year) and 'did a Lewis' and lost it in the last couple of races. Sav won last year.
Now, this year, my usual early lead is a bit bigger than it was in the last 2 years, so I might claim the title this year at last!
IMO, Skyhook has no chance this year.
and let's not forget:
Doing a Racing, Pt III
Crushing one's thumb in the boot lid of your car, whilst miles from any medical help. _________________
It's a '57 Pontiac Star Chief, dontchaknow. |
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D. Twin-charged
My Car: is not twin-charged
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 7558
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 9:57 pm Post subject: |
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| Technically I won in 2006. Though it was the Autocar award. |
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canadian bacon Petrolhead
 My Car: 1959 Austin Healey Sprite View My Motor: .
Joined: 27 Dec 2006 Posts: 2360
Location: toronto
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 10:52 pm Post subject: |
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| Piers wrote: | | Pah, you lot and your froggy heaps. |
did someone say froggy heaps?
before:
during:
and now:
 _________________ finally 27 degrees at the weekend, summers here(ish) ......
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. Dieselhead
My Car: .
Joined: 22 Dec 2006 Posts: 7595
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Posted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 10:57 pm Post subject: |
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| Gawd, you're gonna set Mrs S off now...It does look cute though. |
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