Racing
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Story time: T'was a Dark and Stormy Night......and the Captain said to the Mate "Tell us a story". So the Mate began...
It's been a while since we had one of those threads where we develop a silly story using short additions.
Li'ldude's comment on another thread seems an ideal starting point:
"There was once the most awful customs officer in Brunei, she is the only person I've ever seen with the full on unibrow...."
Add to it using not more than four words.
"in a fetching shade"
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Rodge
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of dark miry red
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.
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with warts and pimples
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Rodge
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and deep pitted dimples
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Eff One
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all over his backside
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kraftwerk
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though he's a she
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Humphrey The Pug
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her stubble was distracting
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.
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as was the hairy
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Racing
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tips of her pendulous
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Stuntman
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African necklace made from
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.
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Voodoo witchcraft antiquities found
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PR
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with a surprising amount
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Stuntman
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of bargain-hunting zeal. "Quick",
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Racing
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cried Bono and Cher
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Li'ldude
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'That's Five words Stuntman!'
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.
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theres a ginger beer
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Li'ldude
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Oh dear, oh dear...
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PR
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sighed a small but
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Li'ldude
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Not insignificant little mole
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Rodge
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. "An interesting selection of..
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Li'ldude
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Rather useless little things,
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Racing
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littered the BMW options
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list, to scampers delight
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:-(
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who'd considered a Copen
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Li'ldude
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To match his wonderful
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BeN
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tie. "Oh dear", cried
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JohnC
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the hair trimmer seller
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Mad Max
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, as he embalmed
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Mad Max
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John Prescott in
(cheating, sorry!)
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DaveGibson
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one of his two
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Bryan M
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large throbbing, strangely coloured
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BeN
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outfits, which he bought
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DaveGibson
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from a Hong Kong
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BeN
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shop, which also sold
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DaveGibson
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sex toys among other
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Mad Max
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the Military Diary 2007
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PG
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which lists several interesting
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DaveGibson
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artillery pieces which may
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Mad Max
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comparisons between highly expensive
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Racing
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recipes for cooking Corgis
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Stuntman
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in their Matchboxes. But
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Rodge
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-ter on your toast?"
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Stuntman
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asked that annoying woman
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Racing
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at Customs in Brunei
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Stuntman
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without raising her eyebrow
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Racing
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or batting her eyelids
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Stuntman
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at the quantities of
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Racing
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snuff in G's valise
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PR
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although she was more
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BeN
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interested in the peculiar
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Stuntman
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chap's peculiar waistcoat.
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Tom
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"Here's to the man
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Racing
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with the snakeskin thong
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Li'ldude
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shoved into his motorcycles
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Chris M Wants a V-10
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panniers and folded in
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Li'ldude
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to his large conspicuous (Sp?)
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Mad Max
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rainbow-coloured, smelly and disgusting
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Li'ldude
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rotten, broken, dog-eared
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Mad Max
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cheerful and funny bus
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Racing
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-sized Portaloo. Bette Davis
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Tom
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had one of those
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.
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Mazda Um Bongo Freindee
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Racing
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forcibly inserted up the
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derriere of Jade Goody
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Racing
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from beyond the grave
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BeN
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which was located far
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Racing
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beyond the event horizon
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Racing
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To summarise the story so far for intrepid contributors and readers alike....:
"There was once the most awful customs officer in Brunei; she is the only person I've ever seen with the full on unibrow in a fetching shade of dark miry red with warts and pimples and deep pitted dimples all over his backside, although he's a she, her stubble was distracting as were the hairy tips of her pendulous African necklace made from Voodoo witchcraft antiquities found with a surprising amount of bargain-hunting zeal. "Quick", cried Bono and Cher, "That's five words Stuntman!", there's a ginger beer. "Oh dear, oh dear..." sighed a small but not insignificant little mole. An interesting selection of rather useless little things littered the BMW options list, to Scamper's delight who'd considered a Copen to match his wonderful tie. "Oh dear", cried the hair trimmer seller, as he embalmed John Prescott in one of his two large throbbing, strangely coloured outfits, which he bought from a Hong Kong shop, which also sold sex toys, among others the Military Diary 2007, which lists several interesting artillery pieces which may comparisons between highly expensive recipes for cooking Corgis in their Matchboxes. "Butter on your toast?" asked that annoying woman at Customs in Brunei without raising her eyebrow or batting her eyelids at the quantities of snuff in G's valise, although she was more interested in the peculiar chap's peculiar waistcoat. "Here's to the man with the snakeskin thong shoved into his motorcycle's panniers and folded in to his large conspicuous rainbow-coloured, smelly and disgusting rotten, broken, dog-eared cheerful and funny bus-sized Portaloo". Bette Davis had one of those Mazda Um Bongo Freindee forcibly inserted up the derriere of Jade Goody from beyond the grave which was located far beyond the event horizon...."
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.
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near a sunbathing topless
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'G'
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wibbly wobblies and two
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Matt
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fat ladies on bikes.
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Rodge
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"Here is the nine
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scamper
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line dancers you booked
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Roadrunner
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Cried Alan. Meanwhile Jade
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Stuntman
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Jagger (not Goody) suggested
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Rodge
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keeping the botox under
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Stuntman
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her rampant bikini line
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Roadrunner
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, bouncing to the tune
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BeN
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of classic Manilow hits
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Racing
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performed by Vladimir Putin
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Rodge
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on a banjo. Meanwhile
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Racing
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an errant breast walloped
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DaveGibson
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Skyhook awake from his
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Matt
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speed course induced narcolepsy
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DaveGibson
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. It was the moustachioed
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Chris M Wants a V-10
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woman who had mysteriously
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Tom
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developed Stockholm Syndrome whilst
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Rodge
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cleverly imitating Tom Selleck.
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Gooner
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But? You keep asking...
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BeN
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"What on Earth?" Therefore
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DaveGibson
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raising doubts in others'
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Racing
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ability to even remotely
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DaveGibson
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comprehend where this story
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BeN
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is going to end.
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'G'
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Chapter 2. It was
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Rodge
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a dark November dawn
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Li'ldude
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In which a man
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Chris M Wants a V-10
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went into a pub
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DaveGibson
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with a parrot on
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BeN
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his head. It sqwaked
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